Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Do you ever just feel like it's too much, like you have too much on your plate, or that your plate isn't nearly as big as you would like it to be? 

That is my week this week. I'm not sure which I would rather have, a larger plate to hold it all, or just less on my existing plate. Either option sounds good right now.

I went back to work this week, today to be precise. School starts on Monday and teachers all went back to work either today or tomorrow. I'm not used to getting up at 6 anymore and I'm really not used to dropping my baby off at daycare. I did find a great in-home daycare that I'm really comfortable with, but let's be honest, it's not at home with me, and nothing can replace that (unless I was a crack-whore). 

As I left work today at 2:45 and rushed to Walmart to get things for dinner and diapers, it all came flooding back to me how rushed my life becomes when I work. I rush in the mornings to get ready and out the door. I rush through the day trying to be the best teacher. I rush to run an errand or two while on my way home, then rush home to the kids. I rush through some down time and play time with them as quickly as I can before I have to rush to the kitchen and pretend that I want to make a well-balanced meal. Luckily kate and Jane are old enough to do the dishes, so I can eat and rush Sammy to the bath and get him in bed. Once that is done, I'm pretty much done physically, emotionally, and in every other aspect and then I get to do the whole thing over again the next day.

I didn't even mention running my chore card business, which I do poorly because I just don't have the time or energy, and then there's my master's degree! AHHHH!! It's too much. Let's not even begin with church callings, visiting teaching and teachers, music or dance lessons, and all the other stuff that comes with being a mom. I miss having a husband right about now, that's for sure.

I'm not complaining really (well, kind of because I HATE that I have to go back to work), just wishing that I was superwoman, or at least had some super powers to do it all with a Mary Poppins skip to my step and a Pollyanna tune on my lips.  Maybe in a couple of weeks, once I have figured out how to rebalance my life again things will feel better and I may be able to play the glad game (pollyanna) a little easier, even if I'm still not skipping around the house singing about how wonderful life is. Oh well, we can't all have Mary Poppins and Pollyanna lives now can we? 

Sunday, August 16, 2009

I'm pretty sure he's mine!

So I was looking through some old picture albums and found what has to be one of my favorite pictures of me. Aren't I cute? However, I'm pretty sure that if I put the same dress on Sammy and let his hair grow (yes, it's curly), you may not be able to tell who is whom. He even has my little buck tooth smile since he truly is my offspring and sucks his thumb just like I did! He's definetly mine and most of the time I'm happy to claim the little ham-bone!